Contract Yo, listen up Mofos jeety af today, all you keyboard fucking warriors and fucking digital stupids! It's fucking ya boy, the undisputed master of the online fucking shit! They call me Fingers of Fury, or simply Middle Finger’ and I'm here to lay down the law in the digital world of meme!You think you're all fucking that, huh? Typing fucking away on your little plastic keyboards, flexing those meme images muscles? Well, guess what, motherfuckers ? I bench-press bits and squats kilobytes for breakfast! You say I can't lift in real life? Ha! I once lifted my stupid cat and a bag of chips at the same time – no sweat! My biceps are so damn legendary, they have their own Facebook fan page. When I'm not sparring with trolls, I'm fending off cyber dragons and battling mythical Reddit creatures. My screen name is engraved on the Great Firewall of China as a warning to all who dare challenge my supremacy in Minecraft. I laugh in the face of lag! Lag fears me! I've got ping so low, it's practically negative! My funny insults are so sharp, they cut through fiber optics like a hot knife through your fucking ass. You thought your memes were dank? Child's play! I've memed with the ancient Egyptians, traded puns with Shakespeare, and even had a roast-off with medieval jeeters. So, before you step up to the keyboard, remember: I'm the fucking ruler of the internet dojo, the digital dominator, the meme maestro, the fucking INTERNET THOUGH GUY.. And if you dare FUCKING cross me irl, yeah irl, be prepared to face the wrath of my mighty keyboard of justice stupid ass! (InternetToughGuy)

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